


You Look Tired, Harry Potter

by Minerva McTabby (McTabby)



Category: Harry Potter - Rowling
Genre: Humor, M/M, Parody, Poetry
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2010-09-24
Updated: 2010-09-24
Packaged: 2017-10-12 03:59:29
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 262
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/120508
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/McTabby/pseuds/Minerva%20McTabby
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A Snarry parody of "You are old, Father William" from <i>Alice in Wonderland</i>. Also known as the Shagging Snape poem. Written in 2003.</p>
            </blockquote>





	You Look Tired, Harry Potter


    "You look tired, Harry Potter," his friends all said,  
        "And your neck shows an obvious bite.  
    You never returned to your Gryffindor bed--  
        What _have_ you been doing all night?"
    
     "Shagging Snape!" Harry Potter replied with a grin.  
        "Adorable, greasy old git!  
    He wanted to lick every inch of my skin;  
        I was only too glad to submit."
    
    "You look tired," said his friends, "so completely worn out!  
        And you say you've been banging the Bat.  
    Forgive us for showing some reasonable doubt--  
        Is he really as good as all that?"
    
    "Shagging Snape," said the youth with a satisfied smile,  
       "Is better than catching the Snitch!  
    What he does with his mouth is so very worthwhile--  
        I scream and I beg and I twitch."
    
    "You look tired," said his friends, "yet it can't be denied  
        You're doing much better at Potions.  
    So tell us: does Snape, the sarcastic and snide,  
        Show any more tender emotions?"
    
    "Shagging Snape," came the answer, "is not for the weak,  
        For even in bed he's a prick.  
    But I've found a solution: just don't let him speak!  
        Restraints and a gag do the trick."
    
    "You look tired," said his friends, "but we're curious now!  
        What else can you do with Snape's crotch?  
    Does he moan? Does he hiss? Would he ever allow  
        A group of us in there to watch?"
    
    "Can't blame you for asking -- but look at the time!"  
        Came the answer. "Must run -- got a date.  
    And it's my turn on top, which is truly sublime,  
        But he'll take off ten points if I'm late!"  
    

**Author's Note:**

> Originally posted [here at LJ](http://mctabby.livejournal.com/114652.html) on May 21, 2003. Written for Cybele.
> 
> Disclaimer: No money is being made and no copyright or trademark infringement is intended. Neither do I intend any disrespect to Lewis Carroll, Alice, the Caterpillar... or even Robert Southey, author of the original Father William poem parodied by Lewis Carroll.


End file.
